I keep breaking down at work. It's always work. Never at home where I see my kids.
But instead at work. I think it's because I hear the Christmas music for 7 hours and I have time to think.
Time to think what a horrible mother I am for not being able to buy my kids ONE FREAKING thing for Christmas. What kind of parent let's that happen! Gosh if I didn't feel like a failure before, I feel like one now.
I used to love Christmas. I used to love shopping ad buying all sorts of things for my kids but it's just not the same anymore. Ever since Larry's work closed, money has been tight. It sucks. And then with having to move because of the house. /sigh
The more I think about it all the more I get sad.
My kids don't care at all. Vanessa is too young to know the difference. For all this I am thankful.
We went to see Santa this past weekend. My son told Santa he just wants to see his sisters happy on Christmas morning. Seriously!? How have I raised such an amazing boy. My heart swells.
So while your shopping, grab a toy an drop it in a toys for tots bin. It doesn't have to be anything fancy but that ONE toy will mean the world to a child in need.
I never thought in a million years that my life would be on this path. But in the end our family will be better because of it. And once things do get better, we will have a better appreciation of what we have in our possession.
Love One Another!